Kermit's downfall, part 13

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Kermit's downfall, part 12

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Kermit's downfall, part 11

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Friday Fiver: Five yous

Sometimes when you answer the Friday Fiver its questions prompt you to reveal amusing true-life anecdotes. Sometimes the questions lend themselves to short answers you decide to goof on. Judge for yourself.

1. Which movie character is most like you?
Bluto Blutarsky

2. Which TV character is most like you?
Ren Hoek

3. Which literary character is most like you?
Nyarlathotep

4. Which song describes you?
three-way tie:
"Jizzlobber", Faith No More
"Satan-Spawn, the Cacodemon", Deicide
"Animal: Fuck Like a Beast", W.A.S.P.

5. Which animal is most like you?
Ground sloth

Kermit's downfall, part 10

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Kermit's downfall, part 9

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Kermit's downfall, part 8

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Quote of the day

"You bloody bastard!"

The following quote comes from a CNN.com article about bonobo chimps. In a nutshell, bonobos are gentle highly sexual chimpanzees, native only to the Congo rainforest. Numbering 100,000 in 1984, there are now an estimated 5,000 left. Their greatest threat comes from local poachers, who sell their tasty meat to restaurants. The quote is from one Richard Ipaka, part-time bonobo poacher and all-around wacky guy. When grilled by CNN's crack news team he expressed skepticism that bonobos were actually endangered.

"Our ancestors have been eating bonobos for centuries. How could they disappear?"

Bird flu.

Kermit's downfall, part 7

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Kermit's downfall, part 6

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"I *hit* the fucking brain!"

Most of us have wondered how we'd fare in certain emergency situations. How would I stand up to torture? If I saw someone drowning, what would I do? If the Soviets invaded through Cuba, how would I find Patrick Swayze? Too few people ask themselves the really important question: how will I fare in the coming zombie apocalypse? It's an important issue. You'll be pitted not only against the ravenous hordes of undead, but against fellow survivors all vying for the last scraps of ammo, batteries, and jerky products. Better to know your strengths and weaknesses now than be left with a broken leg in a looted convenience store with a freakin' zombie shambling out of the janitor's closet later.

A simple online survey will calculate your odds of survival. I took it, and I encourage all of you to do the same. My results are below. When the time comes, keep in mind that I'm good on offense. I have weapons training and am a very good shot. If you need someone to fortify the bus while you send out a looting team, you could do worse.

Official Survivor Congratulations! You scored 75%!

Whether through ferocity or quickness, you made it out. You made the right choice most of the time, but you probably screwed up somewhere. Nobody's perfect, at least you're alive.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 85% on survivalpoints

Link: The Zombie Scenario Survivor Test written by ci8db4uok on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Kermit's downfall, part 5

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Kermit's downfall, part 4

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Kermit's downfall, part 3

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